Mother dearest.
Mom: So, any boyfriends lately?
me: Nope.
Mom: It's probably because you are always running away seeing other friends that you scare away your potentials.
me: Well, I have a lot of friends to see.
Mom: Aiiiyo, because you have so many friends that guys think you are taken. You should just move home and find someone here.
me: ...

So, that does not really follow any logical premises... This adds to the ever growing list of reasons not to move back home.

I was reading my old xanga entries and recovered this conversation from 1/19/2005 I had with Dr. JP... Such a colorful stats professor...
Dr JP: Just remember, I'm from IOWA
me: hmmm... uh-huh *confused look*
Dr JP: You know where that is, right? Midwest; where the cows are from... MOO! MOO! Say "Iowa" for me.
me: I-O-WA. *blink blink*
Dr JP: Good, just remember it! See you tomorrow. *walks back to his office*
me: Yea... *looks over at one of his grad students who overheard the entire conversation; he flashes a grin at me*

Tongue in cheek
Johnny: Are you going to be here on Saturday?
me: No I won't be there on Saturday... Wait, 23rd or 30th?
Johnny: 30th.
me: No, I have to be back here to work.
Johnny: Well then you should just quit.
me: If I quit I won't have a job at all!
Johnny: Oh yea, without a job you won't be able to pay rent, and then you'll get evicted and be forced to move back home...
me: Is that your master plan?

Will: we are torching thigns we hate
me: lol!!!
Will: maybe u shouldn't come
me: I want to join
Will: i might throw you in
me: What
me: what did I do to you
Will: lol
Will: "things we hate"
me: I didn't know you hate me
Will: lol
me: I guess my mission is accomplished

Jerome: did u like my serious message
Jerome: "we need to talk"
me: haha I was like
me: OH OH what did I do now
me: whatever it is, I did NOT do it
Jerome: i'm having your baby
me: shit,
me: you whore
Jerome: haha
me: you should abort it
Jerome: ok done

Jake: i just need to make sure i'm dark before i go
Jake: i might hit the chemicals
me: hahahaha
me: just make sure you get it evenly sprayed
me: and not like, sprayed twice in the same region
me: but not in other regions
Jake: i better get naked too. nobody wants to see a blindingly white penis against a dark body
me: ...
me: LOL
Jake: i'm trying to give you some blog material here

Truth behind gelato business...
me: if you hire strippers to mondo gelato
me: you will get more business
Jerome: i know
Jerome: wat do u think nat is for
Jerome: i didnt hire him for nothing

Pooor Will!
me: I need a ride
me: I need to get on campus before 9am
Will: okay
me: sweet.
Will: your making me wake up so early every day
Will: you are gonna be the end of me
me: awww sorry
Will: and we aren't even dating
Will: wahhaahaha
me: hahaha
me: what, are you suggesting that we should?
Will: no
Will: i'm just saying
Will: it's funny
me: my plan was just to continue using you
me: lol
Will: i figured as much
me: ah good.
me: lol
Will: thanks camie
me: I'm glad we have that sorted out.
Will: my self esteem just skyroketed
Will: and i can't spell
Will: how sad
me: it's ok